Top 10 Mistakes Parents Make on HGTV

My wife and I enjoy watching home buying and home renovation shows on HGTV, DIY Network, etc.

We enjoy seeing the insides of turnkey multi-million dollar luxury homes and how the uber wealthy spend their money.

The rich guy says:

“We had our kitchen island marble stone imported directly from the south of Italy. We got purchased it at a great price of $100,000 for this slab. We couldn’t pass up that price.”

WTF!! Who does that?!?! And how do you get to a point in your life when you can drop that type of money and not think twice about it?

We also enjoy watching a good house remodel. They tear it down to the studs and build it back up. You can bet big money that during the remodel they will find at minimum two of these:

1. Termites
2. Mold
3. A dead mouse
4. Asbestos
5. Electrical issues

If I could place bets in Vegas on what they’ll find in the house, I feel confident that I’d win billions of dollars.  

Unfortunately for us, HGTV doesn’t always show multi-million dollar luxury homes. We’ll turn on House Hunters and see a young couple with a budget of $150,000. Skip. I’ve already seen what a college rental property looks like on the inside. Once you’ve seen a carpet with a stain that you don’t know want to know where it came from, and outdated kitchen cabinets from the 70’s, you’ve seen them all.

Some of the remodels I don’t particularly care for the interior design style either. Nothing wrong with that, but I’d rather watch a different show. Thankfully there are approximately 57,320 home remodel shows to watch at any given time on TV.

Also, unfortunately for us, there is another reason why we watch something else. If you’re living a Child Free Life, you already know what I’m going to say: Watching these shows with Children in them kinda sucks. The shows with young Children in them really showcase parents and their priorities in life. In fact, let’s take that a step further and state the truth:

Parents make poor decisions when buying a home since they put the priorities of their children over theirs.

I’ve always thought it would be fun to be a realtor, but I’m afraid I would be too blunt when buyers say stupid, shortsighted things.

Here are the Dumbest Reasons Parents Won’t Buy a House on HGTV and how I would respond as their realtor:

• Parent: My child’s room would be on a different level than my room, so this house won’t work for us.
• Me: Don’t you want some privacy with your partner away from your child?

• Parent: We need more storage space for our children’s toys.
• Me: Oh, so you need more space for all this extra crap you’ve spent loads of money on and will eventually collect dust? And no, they will not be worth thousands of dollars some day in the future.

• Parent: A pool is too dangerous for my child.
• Me: Let me get this straight, are you saying a pool is too dangerous? Tell me the truth, is that because you’ll be irresponsible and not pay attention to your children when they’re swimming?

• Parent: This house is too far away from their school.
• Me: Isn’t this house in a perfect location and near your work? I’m pretty sure school buses are still a thing. It turns out they actually drive your child to school.

• Parent: The backyard isn’t big enough for my children to play.
• Me: Yep, I completely understand. You want to send your yelling and screaming children outside so you don’t have to listen to them.

• Parent: The house is on a busy street so we can’t buy it.
• Me: Oh my god, I bet you’re the type that wants your children to play in the street, aren’t you?!?! Streets were designed for cars, not children.

• Parent: That fireplace is too dangerous for my children.
• Me: So you think your children are so dumb they’ll somehow want to jump into the fire?

• Parent: The girls can share a bedroom.
• Me: Please tell me you’ll be moving again in a few years otherwise they’re going to hate living in the same room after the age of 7.

• Parent: The house doesn’t have a fence in the backyard.
• Me: You need a fence to make sure your child doesn’t run away? Wow.

• Parent: The neighborhood isn’t in a family friendly area.
• Me: Wouldn’t you want to live in a house that doesn’t have screaming kids around?

You see these types of reasons all the time on home buying shows. Parents are very short sighted and overly worried about their children. They haven’t realized or don’t think about what happens when their children get older, because, ya know, it will happen.

Children outgrow the swing set in the backyard that’s now an eyesore.

Children don’t want to share a room with their siblings as they get older.

Children will learn to swim.

Children will learn to not stick their hand in a fire.

It amazes me when you hear parents talk about all of the trouble they got into when they were growing up, but now insist that they would never let their children do anything remotely similar. It’s like they think it’s a miracle they’re still alive. And now they don’t think a human being won’t grow and learn.

Next time you’re watching one of these home shows, watch them with this different angle. You’ll learn a lot about human behavior. You learn what people think is important in their lives and typically it’s not themselves.

Yes, you need to think about others in your life and what’s important to them. But at the same time, I’m not sure making every concession for a Child to supposedly help protect them is the best thing for you.

Maybe you’d be happier with a Child Free Life and not fall into these traps. 

PS: Is there such a thing as a realtor for Child Free adults? I actually think I would be good at it!